Last night was a weird night all around, and even with that said, what I’m about to say is not the weirdest thing that happened last night.
Eldest and youngest daughter and I attended a concert that was part of a “girls night out” party at a Bible church. The singer/songwriter/musician really was quite talented. And while her theology was not mine, I left with a quiet hope that a young generation of children raised to be fundamentalist may still find room in their hearts for those who are not “saved.”
I say rather glibly that her theology is not mine, but I think the truth is that it is much closer to mine than I was comfortable with. One of her songs started with something along the lines of I may be straight but that doesn’t save me/I may think true love waits but that doesn’t save me. (in my head, I extrapolated that she was also singing but not saying explicityly to this crowd is “you may be gay but that doens’t damn you).
Her song reflected what I like to think is true: it isn’t the words you say or who you are that offers salvation in this life (and the next), but what you do and how you do it.
I was surrounded by women last night, women who love the Lord and are not afraid to say so. And I was glad that my daughters were with me for this experience.
We talked as we left early (before the dessert and “truth walk”–which scared me a little–the walk not the pudding) to get youngest to a sleepover. Eldest offered her opinion that, while it didn’t speak to her about God the Father and all that Jesus-ing, that she liked that one song and the idea that it isn’t what you are that saves you. But none of us were able to overcome that “He knows what he’s doing” theme that overtook us all. While I am a great submitter to the idea that what will happen will happen, I will never, ever allow myself to think that there is someone/something somewhere manipulating all around me to make me learn a lesson about submitting my will.
I like my will. I also like my trust in something more than me. But I also like the trust I have in my own instincts.
Must go and pick middle child up from her sleepover. I’ll be mulling this experience for a while, combining it with a conversation I listened to by one of the UUA presidential candidates and my own life discernment process. There will be more on all this. I’m just not sure when or where.