Just askin’

I’m thrilled about the news out of CA about Prop 8, but I have a question for those blogging and facebooking about it: does it do our “Standing on the Side of Love” message any good to call those with whom we disagree “haters”? I’ve seen some posts and statuses with this very word in it and I am, frankly, disturbed. Some people (I doubt the majority) are acting out of hate, but does our naming them “haters” do anything to help ease society out of a cycle of reactionary misunderstanding? Are we stewing in the hate, too, then, if we use such language or allow those we work alongside to do the same? What is our end goal?

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About TinaLBPorter

I write poetry and blog at www.tinalbporter.com. And I'm thrilled to be writing with you.
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3 Responses to Just askin’

  1. NFQ says:

    I see your point. You’re absolutely right that we should be careful about stirring up unnecessary vitriol. But at some point, saying what you really think is bound to make those who disagree with you feel a little sad inside.

    I always thought that that slogan was more meant to call attention to the fact that people who are claiming to be upholding Christian values, people who say that “God is love,” are actually spending all their time and effort keeping loving, committed couples from getting legal recognition for their commitment. Saying we “stand on the side of love” implicitly says: are you really behaving in a loving way?

    No matter how someone identifies their advocacy, it’s going to make the people who oppose that advocacy sound bad, or at least less than ideal. And that’s going to offend some people, yes. But everybody looks for the most favorable way to describe their side. Should the “pro-choice” movement label itself “pro-death” so as not to make the pro-life side sound anti-choice?

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  2. nagoonberry says:

    Some of the “haters” are proud to be called that. Weird, I know.

    Up here in AK we’ve got this guy: http://www.themudflats.net/2010/03/18/the-eddie-burke-show-goes-off-the-air-and-we-enjoy-a-moment-of-radio-silence/

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  3. Paul Oakley says:

    Spot on!

    This illustrates well why “Standing on the Side of Love” is not the best name to represent our aims. If we define the position we take as being Love’s position on some particular matter, the logical conclusion is that those taking an opposing position are standing on the side of hate. That makes them haters, no? So our banner, with all the best intentions, leads us to either tacitly or explicitly label people who disagree with us as haters. It is absurdly reductive and not at all helpful.

    There is a big difference between saying we (not you) are standing on THE side of love, on the one hand, and (both more accurately and projecting more of the love we claim) “Love calls us to work for the overturn Prop 8/ keeping immigrant families together/ etc.”, on the other.

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